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How Tarot Helped Me Heal and Find My Inner Voice

I spent years inside this inner silence; years on survival mode, when my Tarot cards became as inert and quiet in their driftwood box as my personhood and power did within my heart.”

“...A key part of reclaiming my voice was to create a calm and loving energy to connect with at the beginning of each day. With prayers and quiet music, lit candles and a silent house, my Tarot cards showed me the way to healing.”

Author: Patty Tomsky

The first thing in the morning — before the kids get up, or my partner starts brewing the coffee — you can find me in my home office sitting on my yoga mat. My Tarot cards are laid out on a piece of velvet in front of me, and my Writual Tarot journal is by my side.

It’s here that I connect with my spirit, and find a centering sense of peace to guide me throughout my day.

I first learned to get up before anyone else while living with an abusive partner. Whenever that person infiltrated my internal dialogue with insults or negative messages, I would retreat deep inside and stay there, as quiet as possible.

But when I went inward and connected with my spiritual power in the mornings, I felt more centered and grounded when I had to interact with my abuser later. I could access my voice to tell him my truth: “Don’t speak to me that way.”

As a creative writer and a semi-professional medium and tarot reader, this internal retreat became a prison. Muffled in self-protection, my intuition and connection with my spiritual self went underground, too.

My creative writing, Tarot readings, and connection to my inner voice were silenced.

As a young mother with two young children, I went into default mode. Autopilot allowed me to meet everyone’s needs, get myself to work, and keep up with the millions of different tasks required of me.

I spent years inside this inner silence; years on survival mode, when my Tarot cards became as inert and quiet in their driftwood box as my personhood and power did within my heart.

After going through a divorce, therapy, and a year of being on my own, I reconnected with my Tarot cards and began to heal. Tarot was crucial to my personal healing.

I started a small Tarot reading and mediumship business on the side. It was through this process that I quickly realized my effectiveness as a medium and Tarot reader depended on my ability to go within.

A key part of reclaiming my voice was to create a calm and loving energy to connect with at the beginning of each day. With prayers and quiet music, lit candles and a silent house, my cards showed me the way to healing.

A series of small dogs add to this ritual (or sometimes disrupt it) — my loving familiars, Coco the chihuahua and Clover the Pekepom. Sometimes a child with an illness called for my attention during the ritual, or a partner with a headache, seeking a remedy.

But most mornings, you can still find me here, on my mat, completely unplugged. No phone — just a speaker playing yoga music from my laptop, and early morning peace.

How to Find Your Inner Voice Through Tarot

I believe Tarot can help you reconnect with yourself after experiencing a trauma or situation in which your intuition and inner voice has been silenced.

But sometimes, all it takes is an overly-hectic schedule for us to become disconnected from a sense of calm and clarity.

Below, I offer 3 ways you can craft a healing Tarot ritual to reconnect with your inner voice and bring you back to yourself each day.

1. Find Your Breath

First, I sit with my cards cradled in my palms. I breathe slowly and deeply.

As an abuse survivor, I learned about healing trauma using breath. The body-mind connection deepens as the parasympathetic nervous system receives signals from our calm breathing.

Breathe in for 6 seconds, then breathe out for at least 8 seconds. This signals to the body that you are safe.

You don’t need a velvet cloth or a candle, or even music. You can sit in a chair or couch in your living room, or on a pillow on the floor.

2. Create an Altar

I believe symbols reverberate within our souls. Tarot cards contain symbols that can work on the subconscious mind, and bring healing. These symbols can free up our creative spirit, which helps us find our true voice.

My altar items are transported from a spot of honor on my dressing room altar to my morning mediation spot. I take the little goddess statue (what we call the “Bubby” in my family, a 5-inch Goddess of Willendorf I found at a little shop in Pennsylvania when I was 20).

Sometimes I take the handmade wrought iron deer candleholder I found at the Goodwill 3 years ago. And “my guy” deer represents the male polarity of Tarot symbols. It’s my animus, the yang to the yin energy of my womanhood that gives my readings their active power.

Sometimes I bring along the little laughing Buddha or the giant marble egg. Sometimes it’s the crystal frog, or the St. Daphne prayer card.

As you can see, my spiritual touchstones range far and wide—but my intuition never steers me wrong.

3. Create a 3 Card Tarot Spread

Once I found my Writual Sacred Tarot Planner, my meditation ritual became even more freeing. The affirmation/interpretation/reflection sections of the planner mirror what I have already been doing, but now I have a beautiful book to keep forever, instead of a series of loose leaf notebooks.

After breathing and praying, I shuffle the Tarot cards, cut them 3 times to the left with my right hand, and use my left hand to put them back together in one deck. Then, I spread them in a crescent in front of me.

Holding my palm over the cards, I search for a sense tingling or warmth. I pick up the card beneath that sensation.

I close my eyes, pray for the greater good of everyone involved (even my abusive ex), and turn over 3 cards. Then the adventure begins.

I free-write in my Tarot journal—affirmation, interpretation, reflection. This morning, the Judgement card came up, followed by the Hermit and the Three of Cups.


I affirmed that my inner guide — my intuition — was right to be careful (judgement). I wrote, “I trust my intuition.”


The Hermit in the interpretation placement told me I needed to be more protective of my inner space. We had a family issue with an addicted sibling that had riled me up recently, and stuck a finger in the wounds I garnered as a daughter of an alcoholic. I wrote: “Keep your emotional distance, and disengage with love.”


In the reflection section, I wrote that I would be clear and concise with my addicted loved one about my boundaries (judgement), and honor my peaceful center (hermit).

And to honor the Three of Cups, I wrote that I would pray for the abundant love of the universe to protect him and protect me from unhealthy codependence. My reflection read: “My loved one has his own Higher Power, and I’m not it!”

Gaining clarity about my controlling, codependent tendencies and understanding the limits of my helpfulness have been perennial lessons that come up in my practice again and again. Through Tarot, these morning messages have freed me up to be a creative warrior, fighting for my own voice.

I remind myself that I am best able to help and love others in my family without trying to control the outcome.

Earlier today, after my Tarot practice, I didn’t lurk in the doorway trying to overhear a phone call my partner was having with my hurting sibling. I waited until my partner was able to talk to me, and listened instead of arguing or advising.

I was able to access my inner truth and share my triggers from my youth about the situation. I was able to be there for my partner, while still being there for myself, too.

The thirty minutes I had spent with my Tarot card deck this morning let me show up for him, and for me. My Tarot cards helped me become a woman of strength, with a calm voice that brought healing to me and my partner.

Meditation and Tarot

Meditation is a key tool in my daily Tarot practice. The benefits of mindfulness and meditation can’t be understated.

Making time in your day to bring mindfulness into even small tasks can help with everything from stress to pain management to organ health, and more.

Learn more about the full-body benefits of meditation and 3 easy ways to incorporate it into your day >


About the Author

Patty Tomsky reads Tarot and works as a medium as Lila Satori, a magical persona that means “creative play.” Patty has practiced Tarot since 1985. She specializes in trauma-healing Tarot, female-identified empowerment, grief healing mediumship, and goddess-centered meditation practices. She's also a published poet, fiction writer, and memoirist. Find her on IG at @lila.satori, and on Facebook at Colorado Springs Tarot. Contact her at

1 comment

Suzi Petito

Trauma doesn’t have to be personal. 70 years on the planet, and I remember how it was back then, what is happening now, and I feel “anger” for my grandchidren and what they should NOT have to be dealing with the degradation of the planet and the greed that continues to spawn it. I also, have gratitude for still being here, and all the physical comforts I have been fortunate to witness. This is my balance. I am still open to the fact – that I need to take TIME for me, even as I “think” I am managing. I have loved how Tarot has moved me and my community since 1969. Thank you for this, Patty – with young ones coming through like you – We will ALL be just fine.

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